Ep. 45: Protecting Peace or Protecting Privilege? Pt. 2 with Elizabeth DiAlto
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Show Notes :
In this episode, I chat with Elizabeth DiAlto, known for her nuanced, inclusive, and humor-infused approach to spirituality and the healing arts. She is an Embodiment Specialist and a Spiritual Futurist.
We explore what it means to focus on living a value’s centered, peaceful and soft life, while honoring and dancing the line between protecting our peace and protecting our privilege; oscillating on this line, while honoring community and reciprocal relationships.
In this second part of the episode, we also touch on recognizing incompatible connections, allowing people to be who they are and honoring those who cannot dream within our own work.
Tune in to hear all about:
Transitioning work focus from online to in-person teaching and a new book
Solo polyamory, dating experiences, and healing toxic masculinity
Exploring controversial topics through fiction writing
Midlife women's personal growth and freedom from resentment
Perpetuating systemic racism through social media algorithms and censorship
Weaponizing the phrase "protecting your peace"
About the Guest:
In 2013 she founded the School of Sacred Embodiment, where she’s developed a range of healing and liberatory frameworks and modalities that blend together movement, energy work, and mystical wisdom. Her specialty is helping people live through what she calls the highest part of all of us – our Wild Soul.
A native New Yorker with Boricua and mixed-European roots, Elizabeth is touring the US and Europe in 2024, teaching Wild Soul Movement. She’s also an avid salsa dancer, loves the ocean, and has a laugh that has been described as “a sound bath of sunshine and joy.
Resources:
https://www.jonathanldent.com/
https://untameyourself.com/links/
https://www.wildsoulmovement.com/
https://www.instagram.com/elizabethdialto/
Connect & Support :
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Ep. 44 Protecting Peace or Protecting Privilege? PT 2 W/ Elizabeth DiAlto
Weeze (00:00)
Because rugged individualism is a cornerstone of supremacy culture and dominance culture. It has taken over the concept of protecting your peace to the point where it's like, I don't owe anyone anything. I get to be cold and heartless.
I get to prioritize me and only me. I cut people off quick. And it's like celebrated as though your ability to turn your back to human beings for your quote unquote peace because you're stressed or it's inconvenient, should be a fucking gold star. Like that's how we should be treating people.
elizabeth (00:37)
I recently had joined this Facebook group for women about dating and I was just reading through awful advice that women give each other about dating. And one of the things that was really upsetting to see actually is how many people think it's totally acceptable, celebrate and encourage each other to be like, cut him off girl, block him. So the same way that you're saying leave with curiosity is also like maybe just.
lead with a little effort to just see if someone's okay? Or like, we're not out here trying to make excuses for people, but it can't be, like, it's, we've talked about this before. It's, everything is not all these polarities, this or this or this or this, right? We can do pattern recognition. We can understand certain behaviors, usually mean this, this or this. But the other thing is, when we're denying each other's humanity, when we're just like blocking people and cutting people, and listen,
Weeze (01:11)
Mm -hmm.
elizabeth (01:36)
That's an okay thing to do, you know. We know when it's an okay thing to do, but it's just too much, right? People are wanting to, not wanting to talk to someone anymore. Like you don't have to like block them unless they're bothering you. You know, you could just say, no, thank you. And then if someone keeps coming, fine. But like, even, cause even energetically the idea, like blocking, you know, it reminds me of, remember the Jamie Foxx show back in the day when he'd be like, like with his hand, like,
Weeze (02:02)
Yeah.
elizabeth (02:05)
I feel like we're all just like, talk to the fucking hands without being like, are you okay? And not that we need, and it's interesting too, because a lot of these narratives about who's labor, what labor are we doing for who or whatever, I was telling you, I think before we started recording, one of the things that I've been really thinking about lately, because I really feel it within myself, is this like vibrational resiliency, where my vibe is not so fragile that somebody else having a bad day is gonna fuck up mine.
Weeze (02:27)
Mm -hmm.
elizabeth (02:34)
Right? I could be around more people now. I was more sensitive. It was more fragile at different times in my life. And fragile in this context is not like when we're calling people like male fragility, white fragility. It's like, I really do mean it in the genuine, like sometimes when we're going through shit or whatever, our vibration, our energy, whatever, our centeredness, we'll be a little more fragile because we're stretched. Right? But...
There's also times when we're like fortified and we're good and like we have it to give. And it's just, I feel like so much of what people are pointing their arrows at other people, taking people down, out, this, that, the other thing, all this energy goes towards that instead of like working that vibrational resiliency so we could be together more. We could be with people.
Weeze (03:21)
Mm -hmm. Yeah, and I think we have to start making a distinction between, this person is actively causing me harm.
elizabeth (03:31)
Yup.
Weeze (03:33)
And so I need to protect my peace from them versus I have to have a hard conversation with somebody and I have to admit that, right, I'm uncomfortable. Or even I have to have a hard conversation and I'm not good. That feels like confrontation to me and that is hard for me. And having a little bit of self -awareness or even with the context of blocking, like I see and I hear even my friends and I'm like, what are y 'all doing? Like, they'll be like, I just blocked them. And I'm like, did you?
elizabeth (03:40)
versus I don't like this, I'm uncomfortable.
Weeze (04:03)
Prior to that, clearly communicate a boundary that they continue to violate. No. So then why are you blocking them? Of course they're going to continue to hit you up because first of all, people are not mind readers. And like, I actually said this, I sent a voice memo to Tammy this morning, because we like have been taking seven days to respond to each other's text message. And there was that moment of like, my God, like, I'm so sorry. I was like, listen, unless you tell me,
that there's a reason for your silence that's negative because I did something or you don't want to talk to me. My assumption is you are busy. You are tech overwhelmed. You like my little ADHD ass will be like, I really meant to respond. But then I saw a butterfly or whatever else happened. And then I put my phone down and then four days later, I was like, shit, I forgot to reply to that text message. Right? Like I, I actually assume positive intent. Always. I assume positivity because guess what? I know that I move.
elizabeth (04:36)
Yeah.
Weeze (05:02)
Righteously, I don't hurt nobody and if I do it's not intentional and I've built relationships with people to where they would feel comfortable letting me know like hey that hurt my feelings or I didn't like that or I felt slighted by that or whatever the case is, right? So guess what people are not mind readers if you're just not responding even if y 'all have a fight Grow the fuck up and say hey, I I still need some time. I need some space I don't really want to talk to you right now. I'll reach back out when I do
elizabeth (05:15)
Yeah.
Yeah.
Weeze (05:31)
Right? Or giving people the space to be like you said, stretched. Is your friend depressed? Are they dealing with a lot on their plate? It's not personal. It's not about you. Right? And we really need to actually infu - go back to infusing the concept of protecting your peace with all of the liberatory elements from which it was born. Community care, co -created consent, right? Reciprocal relationship, co -created experiences.
elizabeth (05:43)
Not about you.
Yes.
Weeze (06:00)
effective and honest and vulnerable communication, transparency and boundaries, right? Naming when you don't have capacity for something. Even if a friend comes to you and is like, hey, I'd like you to hold XYZ for me. You know what? I ain't got it. I wish I could. I love you. If it really gets like dire straights, I am here, but I got XYZ going on. Like I can barely show up for myself.
elizabeth (06:21)
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, man. And here's what I'm big on too, though, because this feels reciprocal to me, even if it's not explicit reciprocity, is matching people's energy. We have some mutual friends and have had some mutual friends who we've shifted relationships with over the years. And for me, one of those things, it's always an incredible indicator to me. I've been doing this for years.
Weeze (06:40)
Say more.
elizabeth (06:53)
When I start to notice and feel like a relationship is out of balance, before I say anything, I will just start matching their energy and seeing what happens. Because if I'm already overextending myself, I'm not going to further overextend myself with some kind of conversation that may or may not be necessary. But if I start matching the energy and it fades, fizzles right out, that's actually all I needed to know. If that relationship was dependent on me overextending myself,
Weeze (07:01)
Mm -hmm. Mm -hmm. Yep.
Yeah.
elizabeth (07:21)
I don't need to have a hard conversation about that because if that person notices and cares enough to come and be like, yo, are we good? Like what happened, right? But if they just like fade right out and off, that's all I needed to know. So part of it is also efficiency and effectiveness, which I think you already said that like, and it's not that people don't all deserve something, but like you said, sometimes we have it, sometimes we don't. And sometimes the writing is on the wall and I don't need to go above and beyond to like,
Weeze (07:33)
Yeah. Yeah.
Yes. Yes.
elizabeth (07:51)
beat a dead horse when it's very fucking clear what's happening.
Weeze (07:54)
Yeah, but I think you named something important, right? So if this person reaches back out and is like, hey, I noticed that you shifted your energy. Something's going on. It feels a little weird. You haven't been reaching out. Can we talk about it?
elizabeth (08:06)
Yeah, or like you good? Like what's happening? I haven't heard from you.
Weeze (08:08)
Or you good, like, yeah, you straight, you good. If that happens, then you would have a conversation or maybe not even a full conversation. Just like, Hey, okay, I got to name this thing. Like I pulled back because you'd be on bullshit. Like we're not, there's no reciprocity here. You don't show up for me. I feel like I'm overextending myself. And to be clear, like you said, we have pattern recognition. So we know when this is somebody's character trait, when this is how they move in the world versus they also are like, there's a shift.
elizabeth (08:16)
Yep.
Yeah. Yeah.
Weeze (08:38)
Because if that had been the case, it wouldn't have been, let me pull back. It would have been, let me check on them. Cause I'm noticing that they are showing up differently, right? We approach these things in a way as though like we have zero and granted, I know that nuance and multiplicities are hard for people to hold, but we approach these situations as though we are completely incapable of noticing shifts in people's behaviors and patterns and the way that they show up or just recognizing that this is fundamentally who you are, right? Dr. Andrews, that when somebody shows you,
elizabeth (08:59)
Yeah.
Weeze (09:08)
who they are, believe them, right? Like granted the quote is longer, but that's what she said. So when someone shows you who they are, you adjust. And like you said, if it fizzles out, it fizzles out. And this is actually, I'm gonna quote, cause I don't remember who said it. I posted it yesterday in my stories because this is so true. Well, so the good quote posted it. I don't know, whoever runs that page. And it doesn't say anything other than that. But it says, allow people to be who they are. Let them show up.
elizabeth (09:10)
leave them.
Weeze (09:37)
how they choose, then you decide if that is enough for you, your move. So I used to say, instead of matching energy, I mean, it's conceptually the same thing. My phrase is, I act accordingly.
elizabeth (09:48)
Yeah, I always think about when you say that.
Weeze (09:50)
Yeah, so for me, it's like, I act accordingly. How you show up, because I know how I move. I know that fundamentally the way that I operate in the world is rooted in the ethos and frameworks of liberation, not only that I teach, but that I have learned from, right, those that have come before that have passed the baton to us. And so because of that, I know how I show up. I know what kind of friend I am, chosen family member, whatever the case is. And so,
elizabeth (09:56)
Exactly.
Weeze (10:17)
I'm seeing how you move and how you show up. I'm just going to act accordingly. And my other favorite quote, and I'll just make it shorter. It's a pop quote, right? And he says, he's like, just because I don't want you to eat at my table anymore doesn't mean I have beef with you effectively. Right? I mean, it's a lot longer, but he's essentially saying like, he's like, I still want you to be good. I just don't want you to eat at my table anymore because I can't fuck with you.
elizabeth (10:31)
A thousand, a thousand percent.
Yeah, 100%.
Weeze (10:42)
There's a lot of people I just, Dr. Dre, energy. It's like you are no longer in my life. I don't even have beef with you. If I saw you in the street and you said hello, what's up, how are you? Right, but keep it pushing.
elizabeth (10:53)
I posted something the other day, which was a recycled post from like three years ago that was like, it's okay to just not like some people. And not liking people doesn't wish you mean them harm. You're just not messing with people. And we gotta trust ourselves about that stuff. Because again, there's so many levels and layers to this stuff. We don't need to be questioning why, and again, like the navel gazing, who has time anymore? I feel like two things happened in the last 10, 12 months. I turned 40 and I've been watching a live stream genocide.
Weeze (11:04)
Yeah, yes.
elizabeth (11:24)
And I feel like the number of sentences I started with, I'm 40 now and we're watching a live stream genocide. Like these are my reasons for not fucking around with stuff that's not worth my time, energy or attention anymore. That I was unclear that those things weren't worth my time, energy, attention. And I'm like, no, no, no. I'm not messing. The number of things I'm not messing with anymore and investing anything into. When this is...
The world has gotten here because we've all allowed ourselves and participated in being so distracted and distractible by so much bullshit that does not matter. I'm not doing that. That's one of, that's I think one of the biggest divestments that we could do is our attention on things that don't matter. And I don't mean like stop watching TV, stop doing this. Like our brains need rest, right? We need fun. We need joy. Like I watch friggin...
Weeze (11:58)
Mm -hmm. Yeah. Yeah.
elizabeth (12:15)
Bridgerton yesterday four episodes of Bridgerton, you know, like I have opinions but whatever but like I Need it live. I love when people live tweet me you my friends Yapa (???) and my friend Brandi or I'm like I'm like send me your live texts as you watch please And it's hilarious part of the joy, but even that right like this is actually creating connection We're co -regulate like we're being like and and also we're doing something else. So there's
Weeze (12:18)
my God, I haven't watched it yet. I'll text you as soon as I do.
elizabeth (12:43)
A great way I've been thinking about things is like, is there connective tissue here or not? Are we bone on bone here? Like, or is this just like, we're like grinding against something that isn't, why would we be doing this? Like there's no, there's no healing here. There's no connection here. It's not fun or it's not like, and everything being so like you were saying, being in the struggle, being in whatever, the number of people, especially that I see online, unfollowing this, that, making comments.
Weeze (12:47)
This is it.
Yeah.
Yeah.
elizabeth (13:12)
because people are not martyring themselves and their lives for shit. I'm like, we've been learning. That just solves nothing.
Weeze (13:24)
Yeah, I mean, I can tell you from firsthand experience that a great way to drive yourself into a mentally depressive and physically ailed state is only focusing on the movement for several years, over and over and over again, to your own detriment in a world where unfortunately, you also still have to figure out how to pay bills, you still have to deal with all the bullshit, like,
I said this on a previous podcast episode. I was like, I'm not dying for this shit. I'm not. I'm not. My ancestors literally, I mean, whether you like go watch the Ted talk, right? It was the first apartheid state before we had the word for it. Like massive genocide over hundreds of years. Like they literally died for this shit. Like they didn't die so that I could.
elizabeth (14:00)
Totally.
Weeze (14:22)
run my humanity, my joy and my joie de vivre into the ground for the sake of what, hoping that white folks get on board.
elizabeth (14:25)
Yes. Yes.
Absolutely not. You and I have talked about this. I don't know that I shared this anywhere, but I'm comfortable sharing this because I feel like there might be other people here, whether you're mixed slash multiracial or whatever your identity is and whoever your ancestors were. Mine literally sat me down about two, three months ago now, gave me a talking to that was like, hey, you have more freedom and choices than any of us have ever had.
Weeze (14:35)
I'm not doing it.
elizabeth (15:03)
in the history of our family. And it was all of them. It was like, because I have many lineages and they were like, time for you to live, baby. They were like, what we need you to do next is like fully live.
Weeze (15:11)
Mm -hmm.
elizabeth (15:19)
And they're like, it's okay, like the way you wanna fight, you wanna resist, live. And that's not like a new message. It's not like we've never heard that anywhere before. But the way it came through, because showing me, right? Because they also, you know how they show you things. And I was like, damn, even anything in my life that's hard is not nearly as hard as anything in their life that was hard.
Weeze (15:24)
Mm -hmm. Yes.
Mm -hmm, mm -hmm, mm -hmm.
Yep.
elizabeth (15:46)
And I know that's not true for everyone listening. I'm sure people listening, there's some shit you go through that's worse than anything yet. But for me personally, and listen, some of that is absolutely connected to privilege. I'm gonna tell you how much of it is because I've worked my fucking ass off on healing in a way. Most people don't and won't. And so that was also, they were coming in like, do you understand what you've been doing here?
Weeze (15:48)
Yeah.
Right.
Mm -hmm.
elizabeth (16:14)
Do you see what you've cleared out? And then literally, this was so validating the other day, I mean some people I'm sure listening are not into astrology, but my favorite astrologer who I follow on Instagram and I have a reading coming up with him soon, it's Jonathan L. Dent. He posted something about how people who have their...
Weeze (16:30)
Is he the one who signs while he talks? I don't remember his name. Anyways, okay, continue, sorry. Okay. Yeah, yeah.
elizabeth (16:34)
No, no, no. Who's that guy? I don't remember that guy's name. No. I'll send it to you. And actually, if you want to put in the show notes, because I think people would love him. And he integrates a lot of what's going on in the world with the astrological transits and stuff like that. But he posted something in his stories. He was answering questions. And someone was like, what placements do you love or something like that? And he was like, people who have their North node and their Chiron, Chiron is the wounded healer, conjunct.
are usually like spiritual warriors who are here to like really, really clear out some ancestral karmic stuff. And I'm like, hi.
Weeze (17:11)
You're like, that's me.
elizabeth (17:13)
I was like, damn, this shit is even in the chart. And it's just the intensity of everything is like, none of us get to not have intense experiences, but how are we gonna be with each other while we're having them?
Weeze (17:16)
Yeah, yeah.
Mm.
That part, like, I think my, so one of the things I haven't written about when I was talking about, you know, Dr. Dre, Energy 2024, one of the reasons that I made that commitment to conserve and to like have that energy with the people that deserve it is that I made the commitment that I want it to be a soft place to land for myself and for the people that I love. You know what I mean? For the people that deserve to be in my life.
elizabeth (17:52)
Yes, God, yes.
Weeze (17:58)
because we're in right reciprocal relationship. And I don't mean deserve like in that weird gross way, but just in the way that like they continue to show up for me, right? They show up for me the way I show up for them. I'm like, I wanna be a soft place to land for you. I wanna be a soft place to land for myself, right? So for me, I really keep coming back to this. Like protecting your peace isn't, first of all, anytime you are replicating any element of the cornerstones of supremacy culture, stop it right now. Guaranteed you're doing it.
elizabeth (18:02)
I know, I know, I know. Rawr.
Weeze (18:26)
You know, a lot of times we're like nuance, you can't do it wrong. You're doing it wrong. You're doing it wrong. Anytime you're bringing that shit into liberation, you're doing it wrong. Just stop it right now. Right? So that's one. Two, if you think that protecting your peace is just the like boundaries or the, you know, the like pushing people away or like, like not.
elizabeth (18:45)
Not hanging out with people who drain you.
Weeze (18:49)
You're doing it wrong for me this season. And because also, right. It evolves as you evolve as a human, the things that you need to maintain your peace. And when you talk about peace, that's a cute way of saying your regulation, your nervous system, being balanced, being able to come home to yourself. Right. So you can protect your peace in, in single singular moments, right. When people try you, or maybe you are having an emotional reaction or you're what I.
bothered, you're frazzled, you're triggered, fine, or in a larger sense, right? And so for me, protecting my peace, and I really have made myself my commitment to myself this summer, has been exactly what you said, honoring not just my ancestors and what they've gone through, but honoring those who do not have, even right now, the privilege, right? TED Talk, right to dream, that do not have the right to dream in the way that we do.
by living into the fullness of my life and the joy and the love and the experiences and the happiness. Right? Does that mean, and we had this conversation, does that mean taking significant pay cuts because you're not taking on certain clients and you're making more space and all those other things? Absolutely. Do I still live in California? so yes. Is life inflation real? -huh. But I've never, ever been happier.
elizabeth (19:47)
Mm -hmm.
It is.
Weeze (20:16)
My soul is happy. Like, my soul is happy.
elizabeth (20:17)
now.
That's the highest priority. That's the most important relationship. I wrote down two things while you were talking. When people talk about, I can't spend time with them, it's draining. Maybe try making it less about the other person and ask yourself, why are you so drainable? There's some work we gotta do if we're so drainable, so easily drained. And that's not meant to be like a gotcha. That's meant to be like, seriously, look at it.
Weeze (20:41)
Mmm, mmm!
Yeah. Yep.
Yeah, no, it's just a great question to ask yourself.
elizabeth (20:52)
Because I had to do that work. I'm a sensitive person. I'm a highly sensitive person. I have certain sensory sensitivity things. So even when I went to Egypt a couple months ago, I'm like, noise canceling headphones are my best friends. I let people know. I'm not ignoring you all. I just can't. Once we get back on the bus, I'm not here anymore. And that's what I needed to do to be able to travel in a group of people. That's why I don't do group travel. So you need to tend to yourself. Know yourself and tend to yourself.
So you don't have to be making your problems other people's problems, right? And then, you know what would help a lot of people protect their peace? Learn some conflict resolution skills.
Because if more people were just able to have conversations, like you and I, I don't know if we were recording, was chatting about friends of mine, I had to have a tough conversation with them, and then they kind of just faded out on me. And I'm like, this isn't intimacy, this isn't real friendship. Obviously you didn't like what I had to say or whatever, but there was no, they were basically like, cool, anything else? And then I stopped hearing from them. And it was like, okay, thanks for letting me know after like.
11 12th, I don't like I've known these people for over a decade and it's like or you could be like that was really uncomfortable for me I didn't like it or like like you said like you listen I don't I'm feeling we like I need some space. I don't know but like you really Just gonna not say anything like but then act like it's not real obvious what you're doing
Weeze (22:04)
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think.
elizabeth (22:25)
Yeah?
Don't be out here talking about connection and relationships though when you're behaving like that.
Weeze (22:28)
You know, one of the...
Right? I think what it really like, if I could synthesize all of this for folks, it's like protecting your peace fundamentally requires you to figure out how to be in intimate connection and community. And if you cannot do that, if you cannot maintain connection and community,
in the midst of your peace protection, it's because you're doing it wrong. It's because you're actually not protecting your peace. It's because you are weaponizing the concept in order to continue to reinforce systems of dominance and hierarchy and individualism and coldness and dehumanization, because that's not how it works. And again, big asterisks, like we're not talking about, I'm gonna say this differently, big asterisks.
Not everybody deserves to be in your life, right? So that's a different situation. You, 1000%, are allowed to say, you know what, that person actually just isn't good for me. Right?
elizabeth (23:39)
that it's the word I always love illuminating and giving to people, it's incompatible. Like that's, I feel like that's such a neutral way. I don't need to talk shit. I don't need to judge. I don't need to like position me, you, whatever, right? Right? It's like, this is not compatible. It's not workable. That's okay.
Weeze (23:46)
Yeah.
Yeah, we're not compatible.
Yeah. Yep. I like to say we are two pieces of a different puzzle.
elizabeth (24:02)
I love that. I want to say one more thing about when you were saying about living into your life fully, which this is where our TEDx talks dovetailed because I talked about sacredness and weaving sacredness. And one of the things that I really tried to paint the picture of is like, we are all, I even use like a visual, this beautiful artist, Autumn Sky Morrison, of these literal sacred weavers weaving a tapestry over the world is like, we are all a thread in a tapestry. So what -
Weeze (24:07)
Yeah.
elizabeth (24:32)
What is reverberating out? What is radiating, resonating out in your thread? If it's only struggle, anger, aggression, this, that, the other thing, like other people's threads kind of got to compensate for yours, right? So like your joy, your peace, whatever, that is not... When, I just want people to like kind of feel this image or metaphor, however you want to take it, that like, when you are...
Weeze (24:48)
Yeah.
elizabeth (25:01)
satisfied, you feel safe, you feel happy, healthy, joyful, whatever, that is resonating, reverberating out to the rest of us. It really, we are interconnected like that. That actually is how it works, you know? And when you're, you know, doing dirty shit, we're all feeling that too. And we all go through our different phases and stages, but damn, if you have access to the joy and the satisfaction,
Weeze (25:12)
Mm -hmm.
Mm -hmm. Mm -hmm.
Yeah.
elizabeth (25:30)
Please, let yourself have it.
Weeze (25:34)
yeah, I'll be the first one to say 2020, 2021. I don't know how much fun I was to be around. Just honestly, just because I couldn't, I was so, I mean, I've been in some iteration of liberation work for like 13 plus years. I don't even know, whoa, I'm older than that. It doesn't matter.
We're not going to tell you how long I've been doing it. Yeah, right. Weeze math is being just vague enough for you not to figure out that I'm almost 40. Actually, I don't fucking care because the closer I get to 40, the more I like love myself. I know I'm like, could we do it already? It helps that nobody thinks I'm also 40 because recently I'll say this, I am reversing backward or I'm aging backwards in terms of the way that people engage with me. And this is this is.
elizabeth (26:03)
We use math.
the best. I can't wait till you cross the threshold.
So I.
Weeze (26:28)
I'll say this and then we'll talk about your wild soul tour and then we'll be done because it's a perfect physical manifestation of what we're talking about. So I have been in the work in some way, shape or form for damn near 20 years plus. Right. I actually my first protest, my first protest, I was six and it was for Palestine. I'll never forget. but my first, like I grabbed the mic. I was a, it was right after nine 11. That's when I started my journey in, in this way, shape or form.
And I used to think, because I was still, I hadn't liberated myself yet. I used to think that the badge of honor was like, martyring myself for the cause. And that meant a lot of things over a long period of time, but ultimately what it meant was that I had become a shell of myself. I couldn't even access my own joy. Like I'm hilarious. You know I'm funny. I couldn't, like, I couldn't find the joke.
elizabeth (27:16)
Mm -hmm.
hilarious.
Weeze (27:25)
Like imagine me not having a punch line. I couldn't find it. I couldn't fucking find it. I couldn't find it. You couldn't have paid me to find it. Cause I couldn't, I couldn't access it. I was a true shell of myself. And it took me two and a half years of like first, not even healing, just being like my version of protecting my peace was like, I'm just going to let myself be. I'm going to accept. That was my first iteration of it, right?
elizabeth (27:26)
No, I can't. No.
Weeze (27:54)
And it has evolved to many things. But I say that to say a couple years ago, the way that people interacted with me, I was getting, I was very much getting like ma 'am energy, right? It was like, well, you know, and now we've gone back to miss energy and not that that actually means anything other than how people engage with you. You know what I mean? But as I have reclaimed my peace and reclaimed my own humanity and fully divested from.
elizabeth (28:11)
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I can't believe she's saying that. Yeah.
Weeze (28:24)
martyrdom and the work that I had to do to accept. I'll never forget the day that I looked my therapist in her face and I said, am I a sellout?
And thank God that I have a black woman as a therapist. I made that commitment a long time ago too, right? Cause I was like, I am dear white women. I'm sure you're lovely at your job. Not for me. Not just not for me. I literally like, it was 20, like, yeah, 2022. And I said, if I do this, am I a sellout? And she was like, would you rather grapple with the concept of being a potentially a sellout?
elizabeth (28:47)
Not for me.
Weeze (29:03)
which obviously she then ran me through all the things I was doing even just at that time. She was like, no, but still, right? Like she was like, would you rather grapple with that or all of the health problems that you are already like now, right? Like your soul will inform your body and all of these health problems and lack of mobility and depression. And you know, my CPTSD and PTSD were kicking up real hard, like all of those things.
She was like, would you rather grapple with that, which nobody would call you, except for yourself, right? I don't have imposter syndrome. I have am I a sell out syndrome, right? Versa or an inability to actually just live your life and enjoy life. And like, that's what I needed to hear, right? So I've still been connected to humanity. In fact, I've been connecting even deeper to my people as I protect my peace, right? Because that is a life force for me.
elizabeth (30:02)
Mm -hmm.
Weeze (30:04)
But that is, it's like if anyone takes anything from this, it's like protecting your peace absolutely requires that connection. It requires a connection to yourself. It requires a connection to other people. It requires a prioritization of joy and rest and love and fun and all of those other things. And you are living for others who cannot live for themselves.
because of the way that our society has robbed them of their actual life or their humanity.
elizabeth (30:34)
Yep. And getting people in the right seats in your life. Because sometimes it's not, we have to cut a connection. It's like, I let this person in too close. Or actually, like you and I, we've gotten much closer over the last year even. And I'm like, damn, me at like, we's just about like, this bitch got on a plane for my 40th birthday for 36 hours. I was like, she likes me like that.
Weeze (30:44)
Yep.
Mm -hmm. Yep.
Thanks, Belle.
elizabeth (31:00)
It's great. Yeah. Like recognize all that stuff. It's important. It's important. Like that's how we get through and that's how we keep going, right? Because this...
Weeze (31:07)
Yeah.
Yeah.
elizabeth (31:13)
the sacrifice and the martyring ourselves. People are being martyred, okay? Like we don't have to choose it and we should not. I actually think it's quite blasphemous to choose it when it's happening to others against their will.
Weeze (31:17)
Literally.
That's actually, so that was my message from my ancestors. Yep, that was my message from my ancestors. That was my wake up call. Yeah, exactly. It was like, we were not robbed of our, first of all, like our ability to live full lives, but also just our literal lives. And some of us, I have family members who, you know, were martyred in the revolution, as well as just over the hundred years of genocide. But that was their message.
elizabeth (31:31)
It's almost like how dare you. Yeah. Yeah.
Weeze (31:55)
was basically like, how dare you?
Like you don't have to choose this. Kind of like you said, like go choose life. Choose life, choose joy, choose the ability to flex the freedoms that you have that we never did. Right? That being said, a lot of this ties into...
elizabeth (32:00)
It's real.
Weeze (32:17)
Wild Soul and the Wild Soul movement and the way that you teach and you are going on an in -person tour that I think everybody should come and take a peek at if they are in the city. It's the Wild Soul Tour 2024 shirts TBD. I actually just said that. I don't know that that's happening. It just felt right.
elizabeth (32:35)
Cause I don't even know, like it's funny cause you know how I roll. I'm like, Hey, I'm doing a tour and people are like, where are your classes I'm like, I got one booked in Washington, DC. I'll figure the rest out. Like I just had to hit the road and get started, you know, like, but I'm going to be all up in the Northeast for most of July, August, September, October. Then I'm going to be in Europe, Spain, Portugal, and the UK. Then when I come back in January, I think I'm going to come do West coast tour in January.
Weeze (32:37)
Yeah.
Yeah.
I was gonna say maybe we should do a little ATW, Liberatory, Wild Soul collab. So where would you like the people to go if they would like to stay connected? Is Instagram where you're doing the things or is your sub stack, the newsletter?
elizabeth (33:01)
Yeah, we're gonna. We're gonna tap in probably January.
Instagram is good because I have it's untame yourself .com forward slash links my one link in my bio on Instagram is always gonna have a list of where everything's happening and I'm
Weeze (33:24)
Okay, so the links for all of the things will be in the show notes and then on the ATW website.
elizabeth (33:24)
Cool. Yeah. So I'll have it up by then.
Great, yeah, so that master link, great, that master link untameyourself .com forward slash links and then for tour classes where I'm teaching and stuff wildsoulmovement .com. I just wanted to make a simple website where people could just go to book classes and stuff. So yeah, we'll be out here and it's for everybody. All genders are welcome, ages 13 plus.
Weeze (33:45)
Perfect.
elizabeth (33:54)
Come move your soul.
Weeze (33:55)
I was going to say move your body and your soul, y 'all. What I did not say earlier before we wrap. So I did tell y 'all that there was going to be like a pivot in how the show is, you know, what we're doing on the show. It's not just going to be strictly interview style. There's going to be solo episodes. There's also just going to be me bringing amazing people that I love and love having conversations with onto the show. And so Elizabeth is going to be a recurring guest guest.
elizabeth (34:22)
Mm, mm, mm.
Weeze (34:24)
co -host situation. She, y 'all may know, she had her own podcast, which has been retired. Do you want to quickly talk about the new project?
elizabeth (34:37)
It was called Embodied with Elizabeth D 'Alto. And when we came up on the nine year anniversary, I was like, nine is a number of completion and I feel complete. There's like. And now we have a new podcast coming out at the end of the summer with my friend Alicia Halpin, Alicia Tichelle called Mystical Aunties. So that's going to be and similarly, it's going to be Alicia and I, but then we'll have some people rotating in some other. It's like having a council of mystical aunties.
Weeze (34:45)
And now...
elizabeth (35:07)
Cause we love like, I have all these like child free, like we're not just like aunties in our life, but there's like that thing about the auntie that auntie will give it to you in a way nobody else will, you know? It is. I love it so much. Yeah. So I'm excited, but I was glad. I'm so proud of the show, you know, and there's so much power in like retiring something and being like, it's just complete. Nothing's wrong. I don't hate it. I actually love it. Appreciate it.
Weeze (35:17)
It's the Auntie Energy. That's why I have my Auntie Energy sweatshirts. I'm like, I'm an actual auntie, but also.
Yeah. Yep.
elizabeth (35:36)
I even have people out here like, this feels like when Oprah stops doing the show. I'm like, listen, don't even put me in a category like that, but thank you, thank you, but that is crazy pants, but I love you. But it was some people's Monday morning ritual for like nine years, so I get it.
Weeze (35:51)
Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right, well, thank you for being here for this one, because there will be many more. I love you too. Folks, check out all of the stuff in the show notes. It's going to be jam packed with links to everything that we have mentioned. Check out that Wild Soul Tour 2024.
elizabeth (36:00)
Great. I love you.
Weeze (36:16)
and definitely peep us on Patreon for some BTS about titty hugs and all sorts of other things that are just didn't make the show. Just titties everywhere. All right, y 'all, until next time. Bye.
elizabeth (36:24)
It's a date! Story of my life.